Real. Big. Fart. -Will Geiger 11/16/10

Today, around 1:15, two of my suite-mates and I are walking back from the Commons after a delicious lunch of Buffalo Chicken Wrap and chicken nuggets made from grade quadruple L (Black plague) meat. There was nothing particularly special about the trek across the 100 meters of campus separating the Commons with our dorm. However, as we entered through the doors of James River residence hall, two young ladies were on their way into the elevator with their to-go boxes in their hands. We enter after them because we are all fat and lazy and the third floor is simply too far to go by means of a staircase. Elevator rides can be awkward, especially when everyone on the elevator maintains a stone-faced, silent demeanor. This elevator ride was just such an experience, save one of my suite-mate's knack for impeccable timing with his flatulence. Just as we pass the second floor, a loud, health fart is heard from the corner of the elevator where a red faced, glassy-eyed young man, who will remain absolutely anonymous, is standing. The only noise for two remaining seconds of the ride up were the pathetic, feeble gasping attempts at holding back a ferocious laugh. When we got out on the third floor, with the doors still being open, the three of us started into a frenzy of laughter that could be heard throughout the entire hallway. We made our way back to our room, unable to keep from bellowing. I have never laughed for so long or with so much intensity.